mad brain

Still searching through the ruins of my mind

For a semblance of order amongst the chaos

Trying, in my deepest, darkest thoughts

To perceive the slightest glimpse of daylight

This is the most absurd I think I’ve ever felt

Grappling through the pitch blackness

Searching for my sanity within the dank cave

Having crept under the ‘Do Not Enter’ sign

My own fault; my own fault, of course

Always, my own fault; all my life I’ve been told

It’s my own fault, and sometimes I have to

Reluctantly agree, not to disagree

I chose to step through the No-Go warning

Stepping out onto the railway track

Without first looking to see if there is a train

Hurtling towards me, not caring much of the outcome

I am still no further on into making any headway

Through the monochrome and the gloom

And sometimes forget that I am delving into

The very inkiness which resides in my brain

Wondering whether this will be the place of my demise

My mind, in a fit of madness, has engulfed itself

And there on my gravestone will be etched

‘It was her own fault’: ‘We always told her so’.

Author: Ellie Thompson

Writing my memoirs, musings, a little fiction and a lot of poetry as a way of exploring and making the most of my life ... ... Having had a break from writing my blog for more than three years, I decided to return to write my memoirs, some day-to-day observations, views and feelings. My passion is non-fiction poetry. I have a disability and use an electric powerchair called Alfie and let nothing get in the way of living life to the full. I believe that you can never do a kindness too soon and should give credit where credit is due. A smile or a kind word could make the difference between a good or bad day for a person - we never know what's going on for another soul. Those little things, perhaps, practised daily like a mantra, could mean so much to someone else. Thank you for visiting my blog and reading a little more about me. Please, make yourself at home here. You are very welcome. Ellie x 😊

One thought on “THE MADNESS OF MY MIND”

  1. “As I lay me down to sleep I Dear Lord for you to keep my mind, body and soul. For all there is to know you know so make provision Lord God based on what you know. Keep me safe and wrapped tightly in your arms: safe from all danger and harm. Calm every storm, wind and gave keep my feet from the grave; only when it’s my time to go; take me Lord for only you know. Put fire in my heart for you and your word; continue to be my inspiration, my guide and my light. Direct my footsteps Lord day and night. If I fall pick me up, when I’m weak fill my cup; have mercy on my dear soul if I’m naked be my clothes; when I’m hungry feed my Lord. Let every need be met from shelter, clothes, water, transportation and everything in between. Use my talents to prove an income and to labor for your kingdom. Bless every endeavor and give me new insight daily. In your hands we commit our every concern and trust you to do as you will.” (Tim Wright)

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