After my horrific flashback yesterday, that hit me like an explosion; i think i am beginning to get myself together…(i think). I am exhausted today and feel like…..well, i feel like i have cut my arm (i self-harm) and the cut has almost stopped bleeding, with just a few trickles of blood left, running down my arm but today, i am trying to think of it, instead, as paint running down a wall after someone has painted it with somewhat inferior quality paint.

In addition, i had something very traumatic, happen to me last week and i’ve only told one close friend a little, but i will share it with you when i feel able. At the moment, i am wearing my mask with the smile painted on for the world. It says, loud and clear, “I’M FINE”.

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Author: Ellie Thompson
Writing my memoirs, musings, a little fiction and a lot of poetry as a way of exploring and making the most of my life ...
... Having had a break from writing my blog for more than three years, I decided to return to write my memoirs, some day-to-day observations, views and feelings. My passion is non-fiction poetry. I have a disability and use an electric powerchair called Alfie and let nothing get in the way of living life to the full.
I believe that you can never do a kindness too soon and should give credit where credit is due. A smile or a kind word could make the difference between a good or bad day for a person - we never know what's going on for another soul. Those little things, perhaps, practised daily like a mantra, could mean so much to someone else.
Thank you for visiting my blog and reading a little more about me. Please, make yourself at home here. You are very welcome. Ellie x 😊
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i wear that ‘i’m fine’ mask SOOOO often. You are in my heart today
Thank you, Stella. I know you know only too well about wearing the “i’m fine” mask. Thank you for your compassion xxx
I love the pictures you have been posting, do you do this art therapy? I like your reframe of the cutting. Thinking of you. Hugs xx
Also, I’ve nominated you for the Not Featured on Freshly Pressed Award 🙂
http://lifeandptsd.wordpress.com/2014/02/28/happily-for-now-not-featured-on-freshly-pressed/
Thank you. I have no idea what this award is about so will have to find out more about it before going ahead and accepting it. Thank you for being kind enough to nominate me. As far as my art therapy is concerned, i used to find it difficult, nigh on impossible to draw even a house with a door and four windows in it and it has only been relatively recently i have renewed my interest and am beginning to find it therapeutic. Hugs too xxx