Let my fears float away
in a hot air balloon
above the dark clouds
and up to the moon
All my pain and the anger
sent up to the sky
the winds blow them gently
as I watch them fly by
Rip up scarred words
and burn them with sage
watch them all wither
and releasing the rage
Try punching a pillow
or let out a scream
digging for gold
or my lost self-esteem
Bang on a drum
play music so loud
don’t need permission
it’s fine; it’s allowed
Write down my thoughts
draw out a sketch
pin them up on the wall
and take a deep breath
Let your grievances lapse
write a gratitude list
swaddle the hurting
while angels are kissed.
I’ve had a more positive day today, so it’s made a nice change and was quite some relief, too. I hope it lasts, but even if it’s just a little taster of how life could be, it’s been good to be able to write something a bit more upbeat.
I wrote this after having a conversation with my counsellor yesterday. She asked me, totally out of the blue, what I’d like to do with all my pain, trauma and nightmarish memories. On the spur of the moment, without giving it much thought, I just came out with, ‘I’d like to put them in a hot air balloon and let them float up to the sky until the balloon is completely out of view.’
(I’ve also just started reading a book by a WP blogging friend, Tamara. If you’re reading this, Tamara, thank you for all your support and for letting me know about your books. I can see so much of myself in them. If you’d like me to link you to this post, just contact me, and I’ll be more than happy to do so.)
I’ve just started to draw a sketch of my imaginary balloon. It’s too late to finish and post it here tonight, but if I get it finished by tomorrow, I’ll add it to this post then.
Not exactly a sketch, but a very amateur attempt at drawing/colouring a picture of a hot air balloon. As you can see, I’m not an expert at art!
Ellie Thompson
Essentially Ellie 