A New Face – Where Have I Gone? (A Poem)

Just in case you find yourself
wondering where I’ve gone
I haven’t sold my soul out
to that company, Amazon

I’m a new amalgamation
I’m still here and safe and sound
My yin and yang are balanced
as I stand firmly on the ground

If you’re looking for a reason
why I’ve gone and changed my theme
I’m painting on a new face
to prop up my self-esteem

Here, you’ll see my work in colour
My background, clean and white
The crisp lines of my writing
are far better on the sight

Have you noticed my new title?
No more ‘Thompson’ in my name
Simply ‘Essential Ellie’
I say without an ounce of shame

I haven’t had a change for ages
so, I thought this a good time
The hour is getting late now
I’ve been working overtime

And so I leave you till tomorrow
I think I’ll go and read instead
I’m tired of all this thinking
Night, night, I’m off to bed.

Please note: I wrote this in about 15-minutes, far too late at night. I daresay, it’s far from perfect, but I just wanted to explain my new ‘look’ to save any confusion to any of my readers who might be wondering ‘where’ I’ve gone. Sweet dreams.

Love Ellie Xx πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

Photo by Π”ΠΌΠΈΡ‚Ρ€ΠΈΠΉ Π₯русталСв-Π“Ρ€ΠΈΠ³ΠΎΡ€ΡŒΠ΅Π² on Unsplash

Author: Ellie Thompson

Writing my memoirs, musings, a little fiction and a lot of poetry as a way of exploring and making the most of my life ... ... Having had a break from writing my blog for more than three years, I decided to return to write my memoirs, some day-to-day observations, views and feelings. My passion is non-fiction poetry. I have a disability and use an electric powerchair called Alfie and let nothing get in the way of living life to the full. I believe that you can never do a kindness too soon and should give credit where credit is due. A smile or a kind word could make the difference between a good or bad day for a person - we never know what's going on for another soul. Those little things, perhaps, practised daily like a mantra, could mean so much to someone else. Thank you for visiting my blog and reading a little more about me. Please, make yourself at home here. You are very welcome. Ellie x 😊

111 thoughts on “A New Face – Where Have I Gone? (A Poem)”

  1. Good for you! Sounds like a positive direction for you to follow! 😁

    1. Thank you so much, Tamara. You know that I value your opinions and views very much. I still have many tabs open on my laptop with your latest posts attached and still intend to read them when I can, as I know they are so full of useful advice and information, as are your books. Still learning from them. Thank you for being a wonderful guide along my way. I hope you’re well. Xx πŸ’•

      1. My pleasure Ellie! I’m delighted to see the tone of your posts changing from panic and fear of the future to that of more confidence and positivity. That is a good direction to be going in. I understand that you don’t have everything resolved at this point, but it seems that you have more confidence in your abilities to develop the skills, and to find the answers you seek. It’s a continuous process, where we really don’t ever arrive at the finish point, for there is always more learning to do! You’re on the path!

        1. Thank you, Tamara. I can assure you that reading and studying your books have been part of that change. I have a great respect for your wisdom and self-awareness. I am still learning, but I’m definitely in a better place than I was, and that’s a huge relief. I just couldn’t see my way out of the darkness before. Now, most days, I can see the sun shining, even amongst the clouds. Xx πŸ’–

          1. I feel very gratified to hear that your pulling useful information out of my books for yourself.

            One of the hardest lessons I had to accept was that I’d be doing a lot of, if not most of my healing myself, that no one could do it for me.

            Like you, I had felt very ill-equipped but determined that If I did 1 thing and put it into practice, that I could slowly add more things, 1 at a time.

            The universe is quite amazing, for as we start walking on this path, we become aware of others, and we meet more teachers and people who are a couple of steps ahead of us to cheer us on. We then go from feeling very overwhelmed to learning to slowly believe in ourselves, for deep down we know what we need to heal even if we don’t know how to get there. Keep going!

  2. I noticed your new name first thing this morning because wordpress sent me an email about a comment or something and I noticed you changed it. I love it. Lots of spark. I’m sorry to say that I always read your blog in the ‘reader’ so I don’t remember what your old theme looked like. I like your new theme, the fonts are cool. I’ll need to click through the reader to your blog sometimes so I can view your blog as intended.

    1. Ah, I rarely use the Reader as I tend to get notifications on my blog likes and comments, or by email. When I do use the Reader, I always click through to the writer’s website – I just like to get a more personal feel of the writer. Having said that, the Reader definitely has its advantages, too. It took me hours of scrolling through and testing new themes before I found the one that felt like me. I’m glad you like the ‘new’ me 😊.

    1. Thank you so much, nonsmokingladybug. I rarely use the Reader and didn’t realise you can’t see the theme on there. I’m so glad you like my new theme, though. I appreciate your comment. X 😊.

    1. Thanks so much, Carol anne. I’m so glad you like my new name and theme. I thought that since my writing style has changed lately, that I should really have a new look. I did go straight to bed after I’d written this poem and fell asleep quickly, as I was so tired by then. I hope you are well. Xx πŸ’“

  3. Every poem is perfect the way the loet wrote it. It’s must us poetry critics who want to improve on perfection who make it seem imperfect.
    I did not want to mention the name change since you just slipped it in. I thought is was a good choice, and another sign of your growing strength. You have changed so much over the few months I have known you.
    I think it is time to play a song for you. Be back in a moment while I go steal it from YouTube.

    1. Thank you very much, J. I always want to improve on my poetry. I still spend hours trying to build up the confidence to press that publish button. I thought it about high time I changed my blog look to suit who I am now and where I’m at. Thank you sincerely for noticing the change in me lately. I feel so different to how I was feeling last year and even at the beginning of this year. I’m still waiting for a new counsellor, but am now debating whether to take a place when its offered. I don’t want to go back to that place where I was constantly submerged in despair and I know that I don’t want to go through all that abuse stuff anymore. I’ve done that now and don’t want to slip backwards again. I haven’t discussed this with anyone else, but wanted to share it with you.

      I can’t wait to hear the new song. How exciting. I’ll look out for it. Thanks again, J. I so appreciate your friendship πŸ’™πŸ’›πŸ’œπŸ’›πŸ’™

      1. Not a new song, and your blogsite told me I sent it, but it does not appear in your comments section, so I will just tell you which song I thought of. I Am Woman, by Sandy Posey. It is not a precise match for your situation, but I was singing it in my head while reading your newest poem. I hope it makes you feel as good about yourself as I was feeling about you.

        1. Thanks, J., that’s so kind of you to think that. I will go over to YouTube and listen to the song shortly. Then, I’ll get back to you again to let you know my thoughts. I’m sure I will like the song. πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’šπŸ’“πŸ’šπŸ’œπŸ’™

          1. Can I just check with you, J; I can only find a song called Born a Woman by Sandy Posey but also, I Am Woman by Helen Reddy. Please could you clarify which one you were referring to. Thanks very much. X πŸ’ŸπŸ’ŒπŸ’Ÿ

          2. Helen Reddy. My wires are 5otally crossed today. I do apologize. I had to get up early to go for a CT Scan, and I am not feeling well.
            The Sandy P8sey song would give the entirely wrong message. πŸ’€πŸ’€πŸ’€

          3. Don’t worry, J. I am so sorry you’re not feeling well. I do hope you feel better soon. I love the Helen Reddy song, either way. I thought the same about the Sandy Posey song, and knew you wouldn’t have meant that one. I will read your other comments you have left me, too. Get well soon X πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’›πŸ’œπŸ’™

          4. Hi, again, J. I just started listening to the track when my cat decided to plonk herself on my keyboard, which then cut the music off! So, I was a bit delayed in getting back to you. I just love that song. The one I listened to was I Am Woman by Helen Reddy. You can find the version I listened to and watched here: https://youtu.be/5WiED7UxcRw

            The song just says it all. Every single word. I could identify with them all and am so touched that you thought to tell me about it. I can’t tell you how much that means to me. Thank you, J., thank you very much. X πŸ˜πŸ’œπŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’›πŸ’“πŸ’›πŸ’šπŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ˜

          5. That was not the version I sent you, but it works for me too.
            I fear your blog might not allow links to come in, because it said the comment was sent but never posted. So I will send you another link in two minutes. If this one does not get through there may be a problem somewhere. I will be sending The Hollies, He Aint Heavy, He’s My Brother.

          6. I’m glad the Helen Reddy song works for you, too. I didn’t get a link yesterday, but I’ve got the Hollies song okay. I know that song, and it’s excellent, so I will have a listen to that shortly. X πŸ’šπŸ’›πŸ’“πŸ’›πŸ’š

          7. Thanks, J. This link takes me to the Hollies song mentioned in your other comment, but I’m not sure if you sent lyrics as I don’t seem to have got them anywhere. I’m a bit puzzled. X πŸ’›πŸ’™πŸ’›

          8. I sent a lyrics version. If the non-lyrics version showed up that shoud be a glitch on YouTube’s part. But at least you got something.

          9. Hi, J. I did get the lyrics version, thank you. It’s a great song. How are you feeling today, as you weren’t feeling well yesterday? X πŸ’œπŸ’šπŸ’™

          10. I have been under the weather with a horrible cold for almost 2 weeks now, Day 13 since I first felt it. So far I am not feeling too badly today, but I am still lying in bed. Motion always makes it worse. And I gotta get up to eat soon, so I will find out then.
            The cold is a head cold and body cold together, which has not happened to me for years. My head is thick and every joint aches. Medicines are barely touching it. Bed is the safest place to be… I have spent a lot of time here lately.

          11. I’m so sorry you’re feeling so rotten, J., although I’m glad you are feeling a litter better today. That’s a long time to have such a bad cold. Could it be flu with your aches and pains? Have you tested for Covid? Motion sickness is horrible, so you are doing the right and best thing by staying in bed. What are you doing for food, or don’t you feel like eating at the moment? How annoying that even medicine isn’t helping to give you any relief. I do hope you’ll be feeling a lot better very soon. I can see you’ve sent me another reply to my comment, so I will go to that now, and reply further to that reply. X πŸ’™πŸ’πŸ’œ

          12. Tested negative for Covid. No stomach or gastrointestinal problems so not the flu. Just a big bad cold… And I will get over it.

          13. Glad it’s not Covid. Or flu. Whatever it is, let’s hope it’s soon on its way out. Take it easy, as if you have any other choice right now. πŸ’™πŸ’›πŸ€πŸ’“πŸ€πŸ’›πŸ’™

          14. Just to experiment, I am going to send another song link without anything else. If you don’t get it, not to worry. It will have no special meaning, just nonsense.

          15. Looks like it arrived, so I wonder what happened to the Helen Reddy song. When I saw it didn’t show up I tried to send it again, but WP told me it was a duplicate comment, already sent. Sometimes WP is a scary place to be!

          16. My orange cat Tecumseh just arrived on the bed. He takes over keeping it warm while I’m gone. I think he is yelling me it’s his turn.

          17. Cat’s are adorable. Peanut sleeps on my bed at night because she can feel the warmth of my electric blanket in the winter. She’s the boss in the morning, though, as if I don’t get up to feed her, she starts knocking things off my bedside table onto the floor! Tecumseh is a very unusual name – does it have a special meaning? I’m intrigued. Peanut is a dark tortoiseshell. 😽.

          18. Tecumseh is an orange short-hair tabby who would never throw a tantrum. He has four siblings from different parents, and we have given them enough love (and a huge bowl of kibble) so that they never have to wake us up for food.
            Tecimseh is an honoured name of leaders of indigenous peoples in North America from before Europeans came along. For the longest times I named all my cats after various deities from different pantheons (if gods were cats I would beIieve in them), but when Teuimseh came alobg he insisted on an indigenous name, so he got the best of the best. And that ended the streak of gods. The closest I have to a deity now is Diabola Blanca (white woman devil), then almost twins Millicent and Halverstock (silent “l”), and the younster of the group SiSi, who is the spitting image of Isis, a cat I had before the Terrorists made it into s bad word.
            And now that I have procrastinated for over an hour, I gotta get up. TTYL.

  4. The new amalgamation sounds grand new with best face forward looking with a smile, painting a picture of satisfaction with a new look to enchant many to have a look-see. I see you can rhyme on a dime quickly, and still have a pleasant rhythm. Hooray.

    1. Thank you for your kind words, Doug. I like the way you express them. It’s definitely best face forward, as you say. I’m glad you like the new look. Now, I just have to make time to read some of my other readers’ blogs before I have time to write here again. I daresay, it won’t be more than a couple of days before I pick up the pen (or keyboard usually 😊.

  5. I didn’t noticed the change until you mentioned πŸ˜†
    Essentially Ellie is cool too.
    So that’s the name of your site now.
    I love calling you ET, as you are mum’s age. In India we don’t take name of our elders πŸ™‚
    15 mins is wow, you are amazing.
    Time for you to fly. There are tons of writing challenges, try them.
    One is here on WP. A fellow like minded blogger. Check out her work.
    Drink a glass of water now 😁

    1. I’m glad you like my new site name. Calling me ET is fine. It’s rather nice. If you don’t take your elder’s name, whose name do you take? That’s interesting.

      I’m not great with challenges as I need a fair bit of time to think what I’m going to write about (usually). Last night’s poem was unusual as I wrote it very quickly and it was late at night, too, so I really don’t know how I managed that 😜. Who is the blogger you know who does challenges? I have just had a glass of water and have gone to get another one 😁.

      1. We don’t call elders by their name, that’s what I meant πŸ˜….
        I believe you can write fairly well for challenges. It will also give an interesting push to your writing πŸ™‚.
        Her name is Rebecca Cunningham- site’s name fake flamenco.
        There you can see her latest blog. She mentioned me πŸ˜†
        I think you know her. ☺️

  6. I’m happy to hear that you are doing better and feeling positive. I hope it stays that way for a long time. While I noticed the name and theme change subconsciously, I didn’t look closely at it until now. It looks good!

    1. I’m definitely feeling better now now than I was at Christmas and New Year. I’m hoping it will last a long time, too. I’m glad you like my new look. I wanted it to be a fresh start for my new outlook on life. Xx 🌷

  7. β€˜Essential Ellie’ what a beautiful amalgamation you are! I so totally love you for who you are! ❀

    Fantastic poem! Bravo!

  8. Such an amazing post dear Ellie! Your posts are always so nice and heartwarming dear friendπŸ˜ŠπŸŒΉπŸ’•πŸ’•
    Your posts really had so many things to understandπŸ˜‰πŸ₯‚ GreatπŸ‘πŸ‘

    1. Thank you so much, Yaksh. That’s very kind of you to say. I’m glad you enjoy my poetry. I hope you are well and having a good day today. πŸ˜ŠπŸŒ·πŸ’•

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