Blowing A Gasket (A Nonsense Poem)

BLOWING A GASKET*

I woke up bright and early as the sun rose in the sky
to find my laptop 💻 failing, so I called my techie guy
I was all in a dither; I’m addicted to this thing
I could have read a book, but I have no discipline

My techie guy was busy, so he couldn’t come around
An end to this disaster just wasn’t being found
I sat here all frustrated and did not know what to do
I racked my brains, and then, my blooming gasket* blew 🤯

Oh, what a mess it made, spread out across the floor
It seeped into the carpet and crept underneath the door
The cat 🐈 slipped on the lino and banged her dainty head
I ran out to the kitchen to make sure she wasn’t dead

I watched it trickle down the walls and onto my bed 🛏
Where would it go to next? My heart was full of dread
It soaked into the duvet, and the pillowcase got wet
This was such a rare occurrence; one I’d never forget

I was beginning to despair; I began to give up hope
I really didn’t know how long I’d be able to cope
I must try something else, but I did not know quite what
The gasket had leaked everywhere, and I’d lost the plot 🥴

My desperation spread, forming puddles in my brain
I got a cloth and wiped the yuck off my window pane
I urgently needed a real expert on the job
My techie guy rang later, and I cried and I sobbed 😢

Just half an hour later, he turned up and rang the bell
By this time, I really wasn’t feeling very well 🤢
He spent more than an hour here but couldn’t fix the issue
I sobbed again and asked if he’d pass me a clean tissue

He left just after that; I knew I had to sort it out
But I had tried, and I tried, and was now so full of doubt 😬
I grabbed my carpet cleaner, a mop and a bucket
But all to no avail, so I gave up and said, “Oh f— it!!”

*Gasket – To blow a gasket means to get angry or enraged. I used the term here to describe how I visualised that anger and despair spreading everywhere.

AN EXPLANATION

This morning, my computer completely crashed. I tried everything I could think of to remedy the situation, although I am no way an expert, so didn’t really know what I was doing. I phoned my son, who said to do a system restore, which I did. Nothing happened! A big fat nothing! I tried that again but still no luck. I blew a *gasket!

I had so much to do today – coursework, blog reading and some financial workings out, and here we are already at nearly 7pm, and I have done nothing. Finally, I phoned my neighbour, and luckily, her son said I can borrow his spare laptop for a couple days (bless him). My techie guy said he’ll come back in the week to have another look at my computer. Patience is a virtue, but it’s something I don’t have right now. So, that’s given me the chance to write this post. Above is a poem I wrote this afternoon to pass the time. It’s a nonsense poem that crept into my head while trying to think of solutions.

I’ve now typed it into my blog to explain that I’ve lost ALL my tabs, every single one. I had lots of blogs open, ready to try and catch up with. I’ve got no way to trace them, and although I have a few notifications in my email, I feel awful that I’ve missed so many that I wanted to read. Honestly, I could cry 😭.

(Image by cookie_studio on Freepik)

Author: Ellie Thompson

Writing my memoirs, musings, a little fiction and a lot of poetry as a way of exploring and making the most of my life ... ... Having had a break from writing my blog for more than three years, I decided to return to write my memoirs, some day-to-day observations, views and feelings. My passion is non-fiction poetry. I have a disability and use an electric powerchair called Alfie and let nothing get in the way of living life to the full. I believe that you can never do a kindness too soon and should give credit where credit is due. A smile or a kind word could make the difference between a good or bad day for a person - we never know what's going on for another soul. Those little things, perhaps, practised daily like a mantra, could mean so much to someone else. Thank you for visiting my blog and reading a little more about me. Please, make yourself at home here. You are very welcome. Ellie x 😊

51 thoughts on “Blowing A Gasket (A Nonsense Poem)”

  1. Hello Ellie, I am amazed how well you ✍️ about life experiences. It is difficult trying to function without electronic devices. Have a great day. 🤗

    1. Hi, Tangie. Thank you so much for your kind words, as always. We don’t realise how much we depend on our technology until it doesn’t work. I’ve wasted best part of today trying to fix my laptop, which I’ve still failed to do. I’m on my neighbour’s son’s spare laptop now. He was kind enough to say I could keep it for a couple of days. I’m hoping my tech guy will come early in the week to sort my own laptop out. It’s very frustrating to be without our computers and phones and other technology, you are right. At least, I had the time to write my poem this afternoon, even if it is utter nonsense 😵. Xx 🤗

  2. Dear Ellie, Tech stuff again. I accidently taped the wrong part of my phone, and it thought I was finished. I had laptops completely fail before and lost everything on them. I have flash drive backups for what is important. I keep all my login and passwords in a journal. I have hnd written drafts of everything I write. No matter how advanced the tech claims to be, pen and paper have regularly saved my mind.
    I wish you much luck in getting it sorted out. Take care of your gaskets. Xx

    1. Allie, I totally agree with you about technology failing so often. I’m sorry you had the experience of losing all your work – how awful – you must have been devastated. I know I would be. I think it’s wonderful that you handwrite everything first, and I wish I had your patience. I do tend to type things into Word, which saves automatically into OneDrive (in the Cloud). I also back up onto a hard drive, so if I lose everything, at least I have it saved somewhere safe. I did hand write this poem this afternoon, but that was sheer desperation.

      I used to have a notebook for all my log in details and passwords, but have been slack with that for some time. I usually remember most of my passwords as I use a ‘method’, although having said that, it’s probably not foolproof. Perhaps, I will take a leaf out of your book (no pun intended) and start keeping notes of them.

      I’ve got this laptop that belongs to my neighbour’s son. It’s his spare and I can keep it for a couple of days. I’m hoping my tech. man will come out sooner rather than later this week.

      I really wanted to read your last couple of posts, and I had them both on open tabs, all of which I have now lost. I will do a search in the Reader and see if I can find them. I love reading your work, as I can nearly always identify with them so much. Thanks very much for the good luck and I will try and keep my gaskets under control! Xx 🤗

  3. I’m so sorry! Few things are more frustrating than having our computers crash. Thank goodness the young man let you borrow his lap top, but I’m hoping you can get it fixed soon. I would have blown a gasket too!

    1. Thanks, Ann. It is infuriating. I am lucky to have been able to borrow this laptop. Goodness knows what it’s going to cost me to have mine fixed. I was saying to Jeff, I’ve only had my laptop for 18 months, but the warranty expired six months ago – typical!

  4. Your poem reminds me to Robyn Hitchcock’s song Balloon Man (which is also nonsense)
    I was walking up Sixth Avenue when Balloon Man came right up to me
    He was round and fat and spherical
    With the biggest grin I’d ever seen
    He bounced on up toward me
    But before we could be introduced
    He blew up very suddenly
    I guess his name was probably Bruce
    And I laughed like I always do
    And I cried like I cried for you
    And Balloon Man blew up in my hand
    He spattered me with tomatoes, Hummus, chick peas
    And some strips of skin
    So I made a right on 44th
    And I washed my hands when I got in…

    Catchy tune too. I hope you get your laptop sorted out quickly (and can indeed be fixed). Peaceful thoughts, breathe.

    1. I haven’t heard that poem before or of Robyn Hitchcock, Jeff, but I like the poem. Thanks for sharing it. I, also hope my laptop can be fixed soon. Goodness knows what it will cost! My tech guy said he’ll fit me in some time this week – I’m hoping for sooner rather than later. I’ve only had my laptop for 18 months but the warranty ran out after a year – sod’s law! I’m glad you liked my rather sorry and wit’s end poem. Thanks very much for reminding me to think peaceful thoughts, and yes, most importantly, to remember to breathe. Very important.

    1. Thanks so much, Devang. My tech guy said he will try and get to me again to sort out the problem some time this week. In the meantime, I’m borrowing my neighbour’s son’s laptop for a couple of days. Unfortunately, though, it won’t bring all my tabs back, which is where I had so many blogs stored that I wanted to go back and read 😕. It looks like I’ll have to start afresh today. Thank you for your concern.

    1. Thanks, Mick. I’m hoping my techie guy will come sooner than later this week. I’m lucky to have been able to borrow my neighbour’s son’s laptop in the meantime. I’m so glad you enjoyed my nonsense poem. I don’t know where it came from – it sort of seeped out of my brain!

    1. Thank you for appreciating and enjoying my poem, Andrew. I’m hoping my laptop can be fixed when my techie guy is able to get over to me again. Fingers crossed.

    1. Thanks for reading and appreciating my poem, Deeksha. Yes, you are right – it’s very true that we (or so many of us) depend on our technology these days. I know I don’t cope well without mine, partly because of the way my disability often stops me from doing things like shopping (I shop online for most items), sometimes writing by hand is difficult (I find typing easier), and of course, technology gives me the ability to write my blog, which I would be unable to do without my laptop. I can’t help but wonder what else technology will bring us in the future. There are already AI websites, although I don’t feel altogether comfortable with those. I hope you are well, Deeksha. Xx 🌹💕

      1. We all are dependent Ellie in one way or another! And yes technology is just going to grow which is both a good and a scary thing. But we just have to embrace the change.. what more can we even do? I’m good, thanks for asking Ellie. Hope you are also doing fine🥰

        1. Thanks for asking, too. I am fine, thank you; just a little more than frustrated with my technical issues, though. Other than that, my health is fairly good right now. Xx 🌹🤗💕

  5. Very interesting your nonsense poem. Intelligent words use. Don’t mind it’s technically problem.
    Nice you sharing your experience.

    1. Thank you for your kind comment, Rajkkhoja. I appreciate you taking the time to read my nonsense poem. I’m glad you enjoyed it. I hope you are well. Xx 🌷

  6. Check your browser history! Probably all those tabs are listed!

    1. Thanks, Tamara. I did look back at my browser history earlier, but there are hundreds of different tabs listed, probably because I always have so many tabs open on my laptop at one time. My computer guy despairs of me when he has to log in to help with some minor technical issues. He says having that many tabs open at once is slowing my laptop down. Perhaps, I need to do some ‘computer hygiene’ tasks to remedy this. I hope you are well. I haven’t seen you share anything for a while, so I hope you’re okay. X 🌷

      1. Thanks Elle, I am well, just very busy! You can actually create a Word doc with all the links for the tabs! Visit each one in your history, if you want to save it, copy/paste the url into that document! You can organize into different categories with headings to make life easier. That way you can keep track of everything you want to revisit and not drive your computer bonkers!

        1. Um – I’m not sure I know how to do that. It sounds straightforward, but when I look at my History, there are roughly between 100 – 200 entries and that’s just from this morning till now (nearly 6pm).

          I’m glad you are well. Have you changed your website recently, as when I clicked on you name, it took me to a page that said the author has deleted this site? I’m puzzled. X

          1. I haven’t changed anything. As long as you go to Tamarakulish.com all should work.

            I see what you mean about having a long browser history! If there isn’t a “restore previous session” option, then I suppose you have an arduous task of finding your favorites again.

            To grab a url, mouse up to the url area, click inside of it, and usually it will all select. If not, after you click in the area, do a Control+A to select all, then a Control+C for copy, then a Control+V to paste where you want.

            Actually, creating a spread sheet in Excell may work well for you, because you can create multiple tabs for the different genre of sites you visit! Doing a right click over the name of the tab will allow you to rename it.

            1. Thanks for all your tips, Tamara. They’re very useful. I’m not sure about spreadsheets – that’s like a foreign language to me! I’ll do some googling to see if I can find a quick guide to spreadsheets and take it from there. X

  7. Don’t get scared off by the word spreadsheets! They’re basically lists! You’d just need 1 column, and paste in a url for each website on a new row. The ability to make multiple tabs in 1 document may work well with your brain needing to visually see all the tabs!

    1. I love your comment, Geoff. It really made me laugh. Doesn’t it just happen when you’re in the middle of something important. My laptop is only 18 months old, but it’s just out of the warranty period, which is just typical 🙄. I hope you are keeping well 😊.

  8. Very creative way to vent your frustration in a poem. Yours is wild and fluent and fun. It’s a great gush of emotion like a swollen river but somehow you managed not to be swept out to sea. I blew a gasket too but I wasn’t able to write a poem about it. I suppose it’s a comedy. I’ve been having a lot of nose bleeds. It was embarrassing. I went to the supermarket and had all my stuff rung up at checkout. As I barely finished swiping my credit card and putting it in my pocket, and having the bag all packed, blood started gushing out of my nose. I pinched my nose with a tissue and it was filling up with blood. I said, “Do you have ice or something.” She was calling around and didn’t know what to do. Neither did I. I ran to the refrigerated section and was saying “Where are the frozen peas.” I was running around and finally saw them. I had trouble opening the door with one hand, keeping it open with an elbow, pinching my nose and pulling out some frozen peas in a soft bag. I let go of the tissue for a second and blood gushed on the door and floor. I molded the peas over my nose and put the tissue back. And then I went back to the check-out counter to pick up my bag when I realized I hadn’t paid for the peas. I quickly slipped a tissue under the peas and slipped my finger in so I could pinch my nose and drop the peas…. Yikes, this is getting long, sorry. Anyway I discovered that I did everything wrong because it happened the next day at another store and I found out that you just pinch calmly for 10 minutes and it stops.

    1. Thanks for your comment and for enjoying my poem, Doug.

      What an inconvenient time to get a nosebleed. Frozen peas are often a good idea to stop the bleeding, but as you said, pinching your nose for a short time usually does the trick. I used to get a lot of nosebleeds, too, and they always came at the most inconvenient times. Nosebleeds can be very embarrassing if you are out in public. I can especially imagine having one in the supermarket just as you were about to pay for your groceries. I’m not sure what I would have done in that situation. I’m hardly surprised that you forgot to pay for the frozen peas under the circumstances – I expect you just wanted to get out of there, and the sooner, the better.

      Have you ever mentioned your frequent nosebleeds to your doctor? Sometimes, they cauterise the blood vessels in your nose to prevent bad nosebleeds. I know that sounds a bit grim, but my sister had it done, and she is much better now and hardly ever gets nosebleeds—just a thought.

      1. This is the first time I’ve had more than one in a week. I may go to the doctor. I’ve heard of cauterizing. I’ll have to look into it. I think the most I’ve had a bleed in the past was once in a year. Those were from bad colds etc. These are more weird. They happen after a bad thought, or right before an orgasm. I suppose both involve the heart beating fast. I don’t know. Anyway, thanks for your comment.

  9. Ellie, nothing as frustrating as technology for me. And that’s me, user of just the basics talking. I’ve so much respect for people who know the language and workings and not afraid to touch buttons. I’m wimpy. But I suffer immensely when the system fails me. (Or, I fail the system)
    I cannot give you advise.

    But, the poem that resulted from this experience is fantastic. Totally and majestically so. I love your nonsense poem/poems. All.

    All the best dear one. Blessings.

    1. Dear Selma, thank you for understanding my sheer frustration. I used my laptop for so much – I spend hours on it everyday, either banking, shopping, using Amazon, blogging, typing coursework etc., so I am totally lost without it. I’m just grateful that my neighbour’s son has lent me his spare laptop for the time being. I don’t know when/if mine will be fixed. I’m keeping my fingers crossed as I’ve only had it for 18 months, but it is just out of warranty – typical of technology – if it’s going to go wrong, you can guarantee it’s be just a few days after the warranty expires. Thank you for reading and liking my poem. It was born out of my frustration. Love to you, dear Selma. Xx 🤍

  10. I feel your pain Ellie and I’m so sorry.. been there, done that and I hope it doesn’t happen again. we get so addicted to these darn things.. well we can’t post without them. Nice poem though on the plus side1 ❣️

    1. Thanks very much, Cindy. Sorry you’ve had this experience too. I hate to admit that I’m addicted to my laptop, but I definitely am. I really can’t imagine life without a computer. It hardly bears thinking about. I’m so glad you liked my poem. That’s very kind of you. Xx 🥰💕

  11. So well written, Ellie! I love the imagery of the gasket spreading all over the place. My favorite line was “The gasket had leaked everywhere, and I’d lost the plot.” Isn’t that how it goes? We get angry and forget how to do anything to fix it. It feels like all we can do is sit in the mess and cry. I hope you got it all fixed up now.

    1. Thanks very much, Bridgette. I’m glad you enjoyed my piece of ‘nonsense’. You describe so well just what it feels like when all goes wrong. My tech man had to come back the following day to uninstall and reinstall Windows. It turned out to be far more complicated than either of us expected. It cost me a small fotune to have all that work done! Hopefully, it won’t go wrong again for a long time.

      I was wondering whether you got the email I sent you recently? Don’t worry if so as there is no tearing hurry to reply, as I know how busy you are. I was checking in with you to see how you were coping when things got really tough for you. Much love Xx 🌷💕

      1. I’m sorry it turned into such a big ordeal! I’m glad to hear you are up and running again.

        I did receive your email and haven’t had enough time to write it back with the attention it deserves. You are an incredibly thoughtful person and I’m so grateful we are friends.

        Sending you back lots of love and I’ll write you more soon. ❤️

        1. I’m glad you got my email. It was a pleasure to write to you. Please, don’t worry about replying until you have the time. I know how frantically busy you are so much of the time, so I understand perfectly. I’m very grateful to have met you and to have become good friends here. Big hugs 🤗 and love💗 to you Xx

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