The Flat (True Life Short Story)

Ellie was nine and didn’t want to go. She never liked going there. The dog always smelled and was continually bothering the cat. All that meowing, hissing, growling and barking made her feel anxious. Surely, keeping two animals in such a tiny flat is cruel, especially with six children there, too. No wonder the cat and dog are so discontented and fractious – hardly surprising.

Ellie’s aunt, Lily, was strict and unkind. Ellie never liked her. She was harsh and emotionless, or so it seemed. She had a wicked streak in her, always telling off her young niece for biting her nails. She would rub nasty Germolene* onto the ends of Ellie’s fingers, so every time Ellie started to nibble her nails, she got the disgusting taste of the ointment. Why didn’t Lily understand how traumatised the child was? Ellie was always crying – she was missing her mum, naturally, with her being in hospital again. Why didn’t Lily see that?

Ellie got on reasonably well with her two older cousins and one of the twins, but the other was domineering and a bully. Ellie was scared of Amy, who always made a point of saying she was twenty minutes older than her twin, Kate. She was glad to have her own sister, Jill, there with her. Although her sister was one year younger than her, she was a fair bit bigger and would often stick up for Ellie if there were arguments or a lot of bossing going on.

Ellie hated going to the twins’ school. She was in a different class from Jill, and she also didn’t understand the language in Hebrew classes, as her own family didn’t use it, not being religious. She had no friends and always stood alone in the playground corner during break times. She felt so isolated and very much wanted to go home. She wondered how many weeks she’d have to stay at the flat. However long it was going to be, it was far, far too long.


*Germolene is a strong-smelling antiseptic ointment.


Photo by Help Stay on Unsplash

Lonely This Christmas

‘Lonely this Christmas’, the song sung originally by Elvis Presley. Here, sung by MUD. Lyrics shown below text.

It’s Christmas Day, and here I am, sitting all alone
while my son plays happy families at his ex-girlfriend’s home*
I woke this morning – early – as I very often do
feeling pessimistic, low in mood and deeply blue

No cards on the table or presents on the chair
No tree in the corner, no tinsel; do I care?
I speak sternly to myself, for does it really matter
I’ve eaten all the mince pies and am only getting fatter

I miss talking to my Mum so frequently today
She passed away six years ago, almost to the day
I miss our laughs, shared over long-distance cups of tea
My heart hurts without her, my darling bonne amie

I cooked a Christmas dinner; I ate enough for two
I really should have guessed it; that’s what I always do
I haven’t had my pudding yet, served with vegan cream
I’m bursting at the seams because I go to the extreme

My friend was going to phone me, but she hasn’t got the time
so I replied, ‘don’t worry – I’ll be absolutely fine’
I’m sure that she believed me, my every single word
But I knew that my sentiments had gone totally unheard

Pull yourself together, girl; it’s really not that bad
I’ve plenty to be grateful for; I ought not to be sad
I wonder if the future holds any more of the same
I honestly don’t want to play this lonely, tired game

Peanut [cat] isn’t well; she’s completely off her food
Or perhaps, she is only picking up on my sombre mood
I’m longing for my bedtime to finish this long day
Tomorrow will be better when the children come to play.


* Explanation for this line …

I really don’t know what I’ve done wrong this year. I feel very excluded and ignored this Christmas. My son, Tom, is separating from his girlfriend (now ex-girlfriend). He’s found a new partner whom he loves very much, and they are buying a new house together. Tom and his ex. have been trying to sell their house, but it’s proving difficult in this present economic climate.

For no apparent reason, Tom decided to spend Christmas with his ex., his ex’s three adult girls and his ex’s parents. I met them all before on a previous Christmas Day about four years ago. We all got on okay. I don’t understand why I wasn’t included this year – I just know that it hurts – it hurts very much. Tom only has the children every other year, so the next Christmas I can spend with them will be in two years’ time. By then, my granddaughter will be at secondary school! Children grow up so quickly.

LYRICS

Try to imagine a house that’s not a home
Try to imagine a Christmas all alone
That’s where I’ll be
Since you left me
My tears could melt the snow
What can I do
Without you
I’ve got no place, no place to go

It’ll be lonely this Christmas
Without you to hold
It’ll be lonely this Christmas
Lonely and cold
It’ll be cold so cold
Without you to hold
This Christmas

Each time I remember the day you went away
And how I would listen to the things you had to say
I just break down, as I look around
And the only things I see
Are emptiness and loneliness
And an unlit Christmas Tree

It’ll be lonely this Christmas
Without you to hold
It’ll be lonely this Christmas
Lonely and cold
It’ll be cold so cold
Without you to hold
This Christmas

You remember last year, when you and I were together
We never thought there’d be an end
And I remember looking at you then
And I remember thinking that Christmas must have been made for us
‘Cause darlin’, this is the time that you really need love
When it means so very very much

So it’ll be lonely this Christmas
Without you to hold
It’ll be so very lonely
Lonely and cold

It’ll be lonely this Christmas
Without you to hold
It’ll be lonely this Christmas
Lonely and cold
It’ll be cold so cold
Without you to hold
This Christmas

Merry Christmas darlin’, wherever you are

A Ribbon And A Bow

I thought this year would be different
but no, I should have known
While half the world is celebrating
once again, I’m on my own

Christmas is meant to bring joy
but for me, it’s another sad day
I know it is for some others, too
I wish it would all go away

It’s just like any other day;
there are no presents there for me
Couldn’t put the decorations up
Couldn’t manage a tree

I don’t want silver and gold
tied up with a ribbon and bow
I don’t need the fancy gift wrap;
that’s not how I want it to go

My family around the table;
that’s all I asked for this year
My son was coming on Christmas Day
but now he is going elsewhere

I miss my dear Mum at Christmas
We’d talk on the phone half the day
Both alone again but so far apart
before she passed away

Often, when alone on this day
I take a ride into town
to see if a soul is on the streets
I go with a smile, not a frown

I still have much to be grateful for
There are people worse off than me
There’s still beauty in the world
if I open my eyes and see

I hope you don’t feel I’m a humbug
but it’s extra tough this year
Nevertheless, I give to you
my ongoing love and good cheer.

Warm hugs, Ellie Xx 💓🌲💓