Blowing A Gasket (A Nonsense Poem)

BLOWING A GASKET*

I woke up bright and early as the sun rose in the sky
to find my laptop 💻 failing, so I called my techie guy
I was all in a dither; I’m addicted to this thing
I could have read a book, but I have no discipline

My techie guy was busy, so he couldn’t come around
An end to this disaster just wasn’t being found
I sat here all frustrated and did not know what to do
I racked my brains, and then, my blooming gasket* blew 🤯

Oh, what a mess it made, spread out across the floor
It seeped into the carpet and crept underneath the door
The cat 🐈 slipped on the lino and banged her dainty head
I ran out to the kitchen to make sure she wasn’t dead

I watched it trickle down the walls and onto my bed 🛏
Where would it go to next? My heart was full of dread
It soaked into the duvet, and the pillowcase got wet
This was such a rare occurrence; one I’d never forget

I was beginning to despair; I began to give up hope
I really didn’t know how long I’d be able to cope
I must try something else, but I did not know quite what
The gasket had leaked everywhere, and I’d lost the plot 🥴

My desperation spread, forming puddles in my brain
I got a cloth and wiped the yuck off my window pane
I urgently needed a real expert on the job
My techie guy rang later, and I cried and I sobbed 😢

Just half an hour later, he turned up and rang the bell
By this time, I really wasn’t feeling very well 🤢
He spent more than an hour here but couldn’t fix the issue
I sobbed again and asked if he’d pass me a clean tissue

He left just after that; I knew I had to sort it out
But I had tried, and I tried, and was now so full of doubt 😬
I grabbed my carpet cleaner, a mop and a bucket
But all to no avail, so I gave up and said, “Oh f— it!!”

*Gasket – To blow a gasket means to get angry or enraged. I used the term here to describe how I visualised that anger and despair spreading everywhere.

AN EXPLANATION

This morning, my computer completely crashed. I tried everything I could think of to remedy the situation, although I am no way an expert, so didn’t really know what I was doing. I phoned my son, who said to do a system restore, which I did. Nothing happened! A big fat nothing! I tried that again but still no luck. I blew a *gasket!

I had so much to do today – coursework, blog reading and some financial workings out, and here we are already at nearly 7pm, and I have done nothing. Finally, I phoned my neighbour, and luckily, her son said I can borrow his spare laptop for a couple days (bless him). My techie guy said he’ll come back in the week to have another look at my computer. Patience is a virtue, but it’s something I don’t have right now. So, that’s given me the chance to write this post. Above is a poem I wrote this afternoon to pass the time. It’s a nonsense poem that crept into my head while trying to think of solutions.

I’ve now typed it into my blog to explain that I’ve lost ALL my tabs, every single one. I had lots of blogs open, ready to try and catch up with. I’ve got no way to trace them, and although I have a few notifications in my email, I feel awful that I’ve missed so many that I wanted to read. Honestly, I could cry 😭.

(Image by cookie_studio on Freepik)

Losing The Plot (A Nonsense Poem)

I fear that I have lost the plot
My poetry is not that hot
Writing all day; what a swot
My brain is riddled, full of rot

My confidence has turned to fear
I sense the tension in the air
Do I have words with which to share?
Regarding this, I am unclear

Where did my talent go last night?
I’ve tried all day to make things right
My absent words fill me with fright
There seems to be no hope in sight

I’m overcome with lethargy
My brain is risking atrophy
This is a total tragedy
My shame is here for all to see

Another thing I ought to mention
Is that I cannot pay attention
This, despite my best intention
My muse is full of apprehension

I’ve lost my skills, I can’t pretend
Confided in my one best friend
Apologised and made amends
And this is where my sad tale ends.
 


Image by cookie_studio on Freepik