Tag: sorry

Difficult News …

Dear Friends and Readers,

Just to let you know I’ve had some difficult news today (nothing too serious, just very difficult). It has taken me all day to sort things out, which has left me no time at all to catch up with your comments, or read your recent posts or emails. I was so looking forward to reading them all today, too, but it just hasn’t been possible.

I’ve got some tough decisions to make, and it may take me a day or two to get back into my usual routine, so please forgive me if I appear to be ignoring you – I’m really not. I hope to be back to normal very soon.

As the saying goes: “This too shall pass” … and it will …

With my love to you all,
Ellie Xox 💓💓💓

Apologies To All

Dearest Friends and Readers,

Just to say I’m sorry that I’m not able to write or read your wonderful work and emails today; maybe tomorrow or possibly until I’ve been to the hospital on Saturday for my CT to rule out cancer. I doubt I’ll get the results on the same day, anyway. I expect they have to be sent to the consultant or, possibly, my GP.

My concentration and brighter mood, when I wrote my last post has currently gone awry, and depression has set in, although I’m determined this won’t be a permanent state of mind. I’m naturally worried, although I’m convincing myself it won’t be cancer. No one in my family has had cancer, apart from my father, who had brain and lung cancer, but only for a few weeks before he died at the age of 86. The lung cancer had almost certainly been caused by continually smoking a pipe with strong tobacco from the age of seventeen until his last days. I can’t, honestly, recall ever seeing him without a pipe, either puffing smoke or hanging out of the corner of his mouth.

My mind is in a very fickle state at the moment, so who knows? I might find myself writing something bright and cheerful tomorrow. Alternatively, it might be a more sombre post. On the other hand, there might be simply a somewhat uncomfortable silence for a few days.

So, Friends, please forgive my absence once again. I will be back before too long. I hope you’re having a good day, evening, or night’s sleep, depending on where you are on this precious planet of ours.

With my fondest love and hugs to you all ~ Ellie Xxxx 💙💜💙

You Are The Best

SORRY I’M SO BEHIND WITH COMMENTS.

For my precious and much loved blogging friends and buddies.

Please, forgive me to being so behind in replying to all your comments from at least my last three posts. I honestly will reply to every single one once I’m feeling better from this wretched Covid, which has completely wiped me out.

Thank you for being so loyal and for sticking by me with love and care. I can’t tell you how much that means to me. It means the world. 

You are all just the best!

I will close the comments, not because I don’t want to hear from you, but because I can’t manage to reply to more of your kind comments yet.

From my heart and soul, I love you all, Ellie Xxxxx 🎈🎄💞🥰

Little Bag Of I’m Sorry 💓

Dear Friends and WordPress Family,

I came across this Etsy website (see below) and found a seller of some beautiful items there. Amongst them was this Little Bag of Sorry. It comes with all the items mentioned, which give a lot of heartfelt meaning to the words on the card. I thought it was rather delightful.

I wanted to share it with all of you (I requested permission from the owner first) as a way of saying sorry (again) for my continuing absence from your worthy blogs. I know that you all understand and have been so kind to me regarding this. I hope you can find one of those ‘gifts’ to take away in your mind to remind you that I am still here and love you all.

I know you’re probably be fed up with me saying sorry again, but I’ve now missed well over a hundred of your wonderful blogs, including my closest friends here. That’s not to say you are not all close friends to me, but some writers/bloggers here have known me for many years, too many to list here. Of course, I also very much value my new friends with whom I’ve struck up close friendships (also too many to mention).

At the moment, while I’m still recovering from my [botched) dental surgery, and my drowsiness from the strong painkillers I need to take, I’m finding it easier to write than to read.

I have another appointment this afternoon with the oral surgeon who took my tooth out. I’ve got no idea what the outcome will be, so I am somewhat nervous about going, although I’m taking my best friend, Debbie, along with me. I will update you later if there is anything worthwhile to share.

In the meantime, I wish you all a wonderful day/afternoon/evening/night. Here in the UK, it’s morning, and the sun has just begun to shine. I would attempt to put the washing on the line, but I’m afraid of falling while I’m so wobbly from the painkillers. I am fortunate to have my friend and home help coming tomorrow, and I know she won’t mind getting this out for me.

Anyway, for now …

I love 💓 you all deeply and am sending you many heartfelt, comforting and affectionate hugs 🤗, Ellie Xxxx 💚💐🌹💛

makeyourmark2020 – Designer and producer

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/848883495

Kaput!! (More Bad News)

Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse in my world, they just did! My laptop completely crashed again today. It was utterly kaput, defunct, expired, deceased, and needing more than the kiss of life to revive it. I lost everything; all my work and all my open tabs again, where I had stored all my blogging friends’ valuable posts and more besides. This happened to me a few days ago, although not on such a large scale as today. I’m past the stage of crying now, and if I could let myself go, I would scream very loudly.

Last time, my techie guy came to try to reset my laptop. Today, he had to come back again and was here for over two hours, having to reinstall everything. He charges £45 ($57) per hour. Today’s fee was nearly £100!! Added to that was the fee for coming out last Monday, which was a Bank Holiday. The total came to £175 ($221).

To add to all my despair, I had a tooth taken out this morning. It was an unexpectedly complicated extraction (more about that tomorrow). I was in the dentist’s chair for forty minutes, having had six injections to properly numb my mouth. I had to pay to go privately, as my regular NHS dentist couldn’t extract my tooth because I have a pre-existing condition, which makes having teeth out a risk. In the end, after much pulling, pushing and tugging, I ended up with three stitches.

When the anaesthetic started to wear off, I was in agony. I had strict instructions to just sip water and not to eat anything solid, not that I’m hungry anyway. I still feel quite traumatised and exhausted from the whole procedure. Tomorrow, I can eat soft food and drink warm drinks – whoopie doo!! The cost of my extraction, strong painkillers and antibiotics came to £500 ($632). Add that to the laptop repair, and it totals over £600 ($760)!! It looks like I won’t be getting much shopping this week. Just as well, my appetite has disappeared.

So … here I am again, begging for forgiveness for losing all your recent posts. Honestly, right now, I feel like throwing in the towel, but I know if I did that, I would only regret it. I so wanted to catch up on your blogs, but it looks like it’s not meant to be.

I’m absolutely shattered now, so will head on up to bed in the hope that a good night’s sleep and more painkillers will help me to feel better in the morning. I really do hope so – it’s been a day and a half today!

600 Followers! – Thank You All

Apparently, I now have 600 followers and readers! WordPress failed to inform me of this ‘grand event’ on the actual day, but one of my kind readers, Devang, told me about this. I know it’s not a large number compared to many bloggers who have clocked up well over 1,000; however, it means the world to me, and I want to thank you all sincerely for supporting me in my newish journey to better health and peace of mind. It’s been a hard slog for me to get to this point and you’ve been there when times were very rough and my coping with life skills were at rock bottom.

Without you, old and new readers and followers, I wouldn’t have gotten to where I am now, which is a much happier space than last year. You have supported me through my troubles, been there by my side, cheering me on, and been incredibly encouraging. I am eternally grateful to you.*Round of applause 👏👏👏* for you, my wonderful friends. Each and every one of you is important and much-valued in my life.

Finally, as I often say, I’m sorry I’m so dreadfully behind in reading all your posts, partly because I’ve had my family here for a few days, and any of you who have small children in the house knows how almost impossible it is to sit down to read or write. I currently have 112 email notifications in my inbox, and it would take me a month of Sundays to get through them all. Please, forgive me If I’ve missed your recent posts. Sometimes, I get time to read and genuinely ‘like,’ but I haven’t always had time to leave a comment. I will do my best to catch up, but I apologise if I have missed some of your valuable work.

If I get time, I hope to post a short piece of fiction sometime today. I have it in draft form, so I hope to work on that a bit and my catching up of your posts, too.

Once again, thank you all from the bottom of my heart for the important part you play in my life. I love you all. Ellie Xxx 💖💐💝

Sorry – Out of Order for a While

I’m very sorry to all of my friends and readers here on WP if I worried you with this morning’s post and poem I published earlier today. I just wanted to reassure you that, after a very tough day, I’m okay. Well, not okay, but having to be, really. The last couple of days have been incredibly stressful, with various people (friends and family) needing a lot of support from me. On top of all my own issues currently, it all felt like far too much to be able to cope with.

I’ve been fortunate to have my best friend with me for most of today, and I have spoken to my doctor who said she will call me again on Monday to see how I’m doing.

I wanted to let you know that I’m going to be taking a few days out from my blog. I want to concentrate on my writing when I can, but probably won’t be reading or commenting on as many blogs as I usually do. I love reading other bloggers’ work, but at the moment, it’s all too much and I’ve got to focus on doing the things that will give me some respite.

Thank you for my friends who have left me kind comments and advice today and for emails from a couple of you, which I will reply to when I have time. I appreciate your care more than you can know.

My son, Tom, and the two little ones are coming to stay from tomorrow afternoon to Sunday lunchtime. Although it’s the last thing I feel I can cope with right now, I’m sure it will do me good, especially being with the children. Perhaps, it was meant to be that they’re coming to stay again, as it means I’ll have to take time out to be with them rather than putting myself under pressure to keep up with my blog and social media in general.

I wish you all a peaceful and enjoyable weekend and once again, thank you so much for being here for me as always. It’s very much appreciated.

With much love, always,
Ellie Xxxx 💜💙💜

APOLOGIES FOR ABSENCE

i_will_be_back_soon

Just to let you know that due to serious personal and family problems, I am currently unable to write any posts on my blog and I’ve not been able to read the blogs and posts of my friends here. I apologise for my absence and but I will be back, hopefully, before too long and when these difficult issues are more settled. Thank you for bearing with me in the meantime. Ellie x

“RIGHT SAID FRED”!

This is just a very brief post to say sorry to any of my readers who are fed up with ‘watching this space’ while I’ve been faffing about (meaning messing about) over the last few days trying to find a new personality for my page.

Well, here I am, sort of established but still having ‘issues’ with my widgets!! I think it’s taken me two days of trial and error and even now, I’m not 100% satisfied with my new image so anyone with any suggestions (preferably polite and preferably helpful) will be welcomed. I’m a bit of a novice at getting blog pages just right although I have to say WordPress do try to make it fairly simple even for a simple soul such as me, to get it even halfway right! I’m still not sure I am satisfied so you will have to forgive me the possibility of a few more days ‘faffing about’!

This short, comic and very old YouTube video just about sums up my efforts!! 😀

Thank you for bearing with me to all of those who have done so. Love Ellie xxx 🙂

LETTING GO

Letting go of someone you love isn’t easy….It’s heart-wrenching, it’s agony, true heartache. Taking the decision to let go and taking the action is even harder. What do you do when you’ve tried everything in your power to hold on to the hope that that love will somehow be reciprocated but it never is? Letting go is the hardest thing….Let Go Let God.

BD6743-002

I’ve thought long and hard about this. I’ve cried bucketsful of tears. I’ve hoped, I’ve wished, I’ve prayed. Oh, how I’ve prayed; all through the day to the point where I just cannot think anymore; all through the night until the sun rises and another day dawns. [“Heavenly Father, I hand this situation over to You, for You are stronger than I. My God, You know what has happened. You know what has gone before. Be merciful, I pray, oh Lord. I ask Your forgiveness for both myself and my children. In Jesus’ name, Amen”].

You may think me heartless; callous even, but there is only so much pain and rejection and hurt I can take. I am immersed in a sea of emotions which surround me; the murky waters reaching up to my chin, waves threatening to engulf me. My children cause me so much pain and suffering. If I don’t let go, I will surely drown. If I drown, I am of little use to any other person on this planet. My son and my daughter refuse to have anything to do with me. I’ve recently been ill and in hospital and now I’ve been home for a week, and neither of them have phoned, text’d, emailed, sent a card. Not a word. I love them. I will always love them, from the very bottom of my heart. I will miss them. A part of me has died for each grandchild I have lost in this manner. I’ve no idea how my little ones are – I’ve no way of finding out and it’s killing me and dragging me back down the hole I have fought for so many years to get out of. Both my psychiatrist and my GP say I need to let go to maintain my mental health. Easy to say the words, I thought; difficult, oh, so hard to take the action needed. My door will remain open forever, my loves, should you choose to come back; my love will be there always….it will never fade or lessen.

So, I have to say, my darlings, my precious ones, I will set you free. This is what you have requested (no contact). I don’t pretend to know why, nor to understand. I’ve prayed for your peace of mind, for your salvation. But all to no avail. I cannot hold you back any longer. I set you free although it shatters my heart into a million pieces to do so…..

Banksy balloon

 Sorry seems to be the hardest word…….